Health / Mental well-being

Our healthcare experts at BCBSRI recently created a video series that explains resilience and give you activities you can do at home. Watch the Rhode to Resilience.

What is resilience?

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from challenges. Think of it like a tree in the wind. It bends but returns to its normal position. At BCBSRI, we think of resilience as having four elements:

  • Perspective
  • Connection
  • Sense of purpose
  • Gratitude

Here are four tips to help you build your resilience. Remember, these are practices, like playing a piano. Give yourself the gift not only of learning but of taking the time to practice. 

1. Change your perspective.

We can’t always control the things that happen to us. But we can control how we react to them. Being resilient means we’re able to embrace healthy, positive thoughts, and that mindset can help us through tough times.

Try this
Think about a difficult experience you’re facing and how you feel about it. Now try using your name, as though you’re talking about someone else. For example, ask yourself, “Why does Jane feel this way? What are the underlying reasons for her feelings?” Spend three minutes reflecting, writing down your thoughts if you’d like. It feels odd to write about yourself this way, but it can help you confront difficult feelings without becoming overwhelmed by them.

2. Connect with people.

Consciously or not, our lives revolve around connections, and they are an important part of resilience, helping us to better handle the challenges we face through our lives. Remember that you don’t have to face your challenges all alone.

Try this
Create a bucket list of social activities you’d like to do. Are there old friends you want to re-connect with? Is there a group you have been meaning to join? Keep your list someplace you will see it and act on it. Each time you look at it, think about how each of those actions helps you build connections. Even virtual connections are important.

3. Find your purpose.

Having a sense of purpose makes it easier to bounce back from challenges by providing perspective, stability, confidence, and determination. It’s much harder to be defeated by challenges in your life when you are passionate about what you’re doing. And you just might find a sense of purpose if you step back and look at the impact you already have on other people.

Try this
Ask yourself these questions to get you moving toward your own sense of purpose:

  • What things would you do even if you didn't get paid for them?
  • What do other people say you're good at?
  • If you had all the money in the world, how would you spend your time?

4. Practice gratitude.

Being grateful doesn’t erase whatever pain we’re feeling or the struggles we’re experiencing. Instead, it helps us appreciate what is good in our lives—even while acknowledging that bad things happen. For example, many of us are working from home now, and that can be stressful. We can focus on the problems that causes, or we can find little things to appreciate—like not having to commute, more dinners at home with our family, or the opportunity to take a walk at lunchtime. 

Try this
Start a gratitude journal. Some people set aside a specific time each day to write down what they are grateful for. Others write one item each day or keep a running list they add to whenever something makes them feel grateful. By actively writing these down, you are consciously choosing to focus on the good. That can help to reframe your perspective and give you the energy to keep pushing forward … in other words, to become more resilient.